Thursday, February 27, 2020

",,,sugar"



I wrote this over 10 years ago,...just found it.

"The Ring-Ding Episode"
Okay here's the situation. I just worked for about 18 hours straight. I'm completely fried. My eyes are cooked from staring at various ctr screens, and I'm totally irradiated from being in close quarters with broadcast equipment.
But this isn't the problem.
Going blind, being radioactive, having the flu, being radically stressed out, and awake for a couple of days is no big deal I've been doing this sort of thing for 30 years.
What I'm worried about are the 'Eight' count'em 8!! Ring Dings, (tm) I just ate in rapid succession, and then washed down with several cans of Pepsi.
I figured this would pep me up.
Anyway what I wanna know is,...are them things gonna kill me?
Granted I used to consume vast quantities of dangerous drugs while doing all the above mentioned work. Eh, this was back in the day, and it was socially acceptable. ...ahem.
However Ring Dings as wonderful as they are are also far more dangerous than any combination of nasally absorbed powdered additives. I think the Pepsi may be the triggering mechanism of this little drama.
I can hear the EMT guys talking over my deflating body in the meat wagon.
"What a dummy."
"If he just sucked down them Pepsi's, and nuthin' else he would'a made it."
"If he had 'only' scoffed down that bucket of Ring Dings, and left it at that ditto!"
"But ya can't do both, and sure as hell not at the same time!"
So should I be calling all the people that have bleeped me over during my life so I either forgive them or finally tell them what I really think of them.
Or...., should I have some more cream filled, chocolate coated, sugar glazed bits of Heaven?
Dammit if this country had National Health I wouldn't have to worry!

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