“Once upon a time”
Peter Rabbit was drafted into Farmland Security. His Sargent was a raccoon with a serious pine cone habit. He was mean had bad breath, and yelled at poor Peter all the time.
The food was awful, and the other bunnies called him names beat him up, and stole the carrots which his mommy had sent him.
There was also a rumor of sexual abuse
Oh, but Peter was still the sweet bunny that everyone knew, and loved.
Well yes he did shoot farmer McGregor,…and his whole family.
...but you must admit that lot had it coming.
The McGregor farm massacre, and all his other random shootings did make him a little sad. However Peter was after all just a rabbit so he forgot most of what he’d done.
Well after some book burnings, and executions of assorted malcontents Peter's tour of duty with Farmland Security was over. He signed the oath of secrecy about all the folks they shot, and he hopped home to his Mama for a nice supper of cabbage stew.
“Anything interesting happen on your way home from Farmland Service Peter?”
Asked Mama rabbit giving all of her sweet babies second helpings of carrot pie.
“Um, no Mama”,…said Peter.
“Well other than blasting that redneck McGregor to bloody shreds, and jelly,..no.”
“Good said Mama Bunny” “That rancid turd killed your Papa, ate’em too”
“You did right son!”
“Thank you Mama”, said Peter.
The End.
Stay Tuned.
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