Monday, February 5, 2018
"...fucked"
"The Easter Bunny Laid Off"
The "Federal Department of Fantasies, and Fictitious Characters" today in what will sure to be seen as a controversial move has laid off a number of it's employees. This is a cost cutting act which the administration was forced to take.
This because of the refusal by the Republican controlled House to pass the funding bill for the Fantasy Department.
Republican majority leader Himmler stated that funds for the department of fantasies was a "typical liberal waste of funds". Also that these resources were needed for far more "practical, and necessary projects" such as the "Mexican Wall".
The Easter Bunny the Sandman Tooth Fairy Batman the former Saint Christopher the Little Prince Peter Rabbit Santa's Elves, and a number of other beloved fictional characters were all contacted by email, and let go.
Santa, and Wonder Woman because of their importance to the democratic base were given temporary reprieves until fiscal 2018. Superman because of his connections with the Defense Department is for now exempt from these economic cuts.
Some because of high profiles such as Batman have already been hired by commercial interests. Others such as the Little Prince, and Peter Rabbit with smaller financial probabilities will likely retire, and enter private life.
Though there is the possibility of a small livelihood for a few magical characters through speaking engagements.
More on this story as developments warrant.
*******This just in. The Little Prince representing a number of the Fantasy Department's newly laid off is suing Republican majority leader Himmler.
Saying that his acts, and that of his party are Un-Constitutional.
This in that it violates the 1964 Civil Rights Act. Which now also protects fictional characters. In particularly those employed by the Federal Government.
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